A month to forget...

This month started out well, but has crashed over the past 2 weeks. . .

One of my rocks-(a stable NICU kiddo) started to get sick on presidents day, and just tanked. He died 2 days later. It was a tough few days, and in the end we withdrew care so that he could die in his parents arms--the first and only time that they would ever hold him while he was alive.

Patrick and I also decided to stop dating. This has been the most difficult decision I have had to make in years. He is a wonderful guy, and I am hopeful that we will remain very good friends for a long time.

I'm looking forward to March. . .

B

Midas Touch in the NICU

Intubation in the NICU has been my nemesis. The art of taking a tiny tube and sneaking it past the vocal cords with goal of rescuing a tiny human who can't breathe and giving them the vital capacity to get oxygen has been the bane of my NICU confidence. I was ZERO for three. Until yesterday, when I was able to finally find a bit of confidence and was able to intubate 3 kids, all were emergent intubations too... It was one of those beautiful days at work where things made sense, I knew what to do. I've had some sick kiddos and yesterday they were turning the corner. I literally watched them get better in the 24 hours I was there. That is job satisfaction. At 3am I just walked through the NICU (I had one really sick kid and knew I wasn't going to sleep all night) and peeked in on a few kids, watching them breathe. It was very calming. These kids are going to make it. (I knew I was delirious from exhaustion when I was looking into NICU fellowships at 4am)... Not headed that route..

B

NICU, again

So, I am back in the NICU. NICU is an interesting place... But better the second time around. I have had two nights on call so far, and an amazingly, have only admitted one kiddo.

Not much else exciting going on. It has been damn cold here. The good news is I have an incredible sale at GAP and Banana Republic, and have new wool sweaters to add to my wardrobe.

Things are going well with Patrick...

Not much else exciting to report. Things are very good overall. I have some free weekends in March if anybody fancies a visit to Western Massachusetts, and am scouting some ticket prices various locations, but haven't found any great deals so far.

Cheers,

Brian