Home Sweet Home

It's great being back here, finally. I've seen all the fam. The kids are so big. It's been a joy just watching them play, and playing with them. The snow it pretty crazy. The tiny rental car that I have is a death trap in the snow, so that's putting a wee bit of a damper on the travel/social schedule. But really, it's been nice to just hang out with family. Patrick arrived yesterday am, on schedule. He's beginning to realize that there really are Bost traits.. I don't think he should be allowed to hang out with Nikki and Janice, they have too much inside scoop on how to manipulate Bost men...

Final Countdown

Thank god, only 3 more days to go til vacation. Honestly, I don't think I could work more than 3 more days. . . Last week really wasn't much fun. I think I'd rather stick my tongue on a frozen metal pole, repeatedly, than work this much. Looking back, I certainly can say that for the first time, I felt that I was less than professional at times. I hit a cynical low point, and at one point had to bite my tongue (I don't know why I keep coming up with ways to hurt my tongue) so that I didn't call a patient by a term normally only heard on navy vessels and at truckstops. But seriously, I had taken care of this drug seeker for a few days, and then he disrespected me. I wasn't too thrilled. . . It's been interesting to see how I deal with these times of extreme fatigue. Part of me wishes I could re-do last week to see if I could shed some of the bitterness and irritability that was pervasive.

What's keeping me going. Honestly, I can't wait to see Jordan and Ryan and Haley. It kills me that it will have been a year since I saw them. A year. A fucking year. Give me the kiddos, piper and bailey, and let me spend the days with them.

So, it's Christmas eve.. I spent a good chunk of time this evening telling a 21 year old that the reason she couldn't breathe wasn't, in fact, due to pneumonia, but rather because she has a mass in her lungs. A mass. Not a good thing. She, and her family, will wake up in the ICU on christmas day, and the ONLY THING they will be able to think is, "IS THIS CANCER?" Cancer. Is it cancer? Merry Christmas.

Jesus, it is Christmas in 30 minutes. It doesn't seem possible. I haven't seen snow this fall/winter. What's up with that? I know that you people in Denver have seen plenty of it, but I'm dying to see some of it. Snow.

I guess that's about it really. My contacts are stickying to my eyeballs. My mind wants to stay up, maybe do some work, some xmas cards, call people on the west coast. But sadly, in 7 hours I'll be headed back to work.

Honestly though, waking up on Christmas morning, alone in my apartment, isn't bad. I'm waking up healthy, maybe suffering from fatigue, but my friends, my family, and my boyfriend are all waking up healthy, and hopefully happy. Really, what else could one want for christmas??

Half Way

-one day off in the past 15 days
-one day off in the next 15 days
-an empty fridge
-topics to review
-phone calls to make
-emails to write
-a stack of unopened mail
-no time to take shirts to the dry cleaner
-why hasn't it snowed yet?
-Ireland seems like 6 months ago
-what kind of medicine do I really want to practice
-a big city, or small mountain town

I started rounding at 6am.
I am going to bed.

-B

Fucking Bitter

This is bullshit. I'm working 29 out of 31 days. I am off today, and have one day off in the next 24. What the fuck kind of bullshit is this? I went to bed at 8:30 pm last night, fucking exhausted after putting in 30 hours in 2 days. What the fuck is the purpose of having a day off? It's not enough time to do laundry, grocery shop, make calls, emails, study, let alone spend time with Patrick.

Argh! I am not a happy camper today.

Now I'm getting on-line to finish discharge summaries from the past 2 days.
b